Endless Stripper Montage for Jesus on FOX NEWS!

Holy Hotties?

JC's Girls bring faith to strip clubs

Strippers for Jesus: Sanctimonious born again strippers who pay for lap dances and try to convert the stripper dancing for them. Titled: "Holy Hotties: JC's Girls bring faith to strip clubs"). Quotatble Quotes: "Meanwhile their mission is saving strippers, quite literally. They go into strip clubs, pay for a lap dance, but instead use the time with the stripper to get her to give up life on the pole for life committed to Jesus Christ, and get this! It's a group of women doing this! [terrifying women with long bleach blonde hair, the one on the right with ample facial plastic surgery, who knows about the breasts]...

To left of announcer, bathed in purple light, wearing a tight-fitting HUSTLER baby tank top, J-Lo's FUCKING HOT little sister gingerly bobs up and down on an imaginary dick! Is she masrturbating?! No, she's just caressing her inside of her young, smooth thigh. JEZABELLE! TEMPTRESS! How dare you impune your sinful ways on my red-state programming! Maybe I should go pay for a lap dance only to convert the wayward young lady to God's Path?

Former Stripper: "And while I was there, In This Perfect Christian World Bubble, I learned that a girlfriend I had in the [stripping] industry, had passed away from alcoholism."

There's something really spiritually profound in Heather's words. To understand, try to put yourself in Heather's frame of spiritual enlightentment and repeat as you would a Buddhist Mantra:

This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble This Perfect Christian World Bubble

Seriously! Go back and try it. Take a deap breath, open yourself to grace, maintain good posture and a positive view of the world and say "This perfect Christian...." Know what it feels like to be GW Bush? Know what it feels like to get all your news from FOX?

Cavuto: "you pay for the dance, you have your audience with the stripper, what do you do, what do you say?"



"Well, what we say is, we do not want you to actually dance for us..." [MEANWHILE, J-LOs FUCKING HOT little sister is suddenly blown up full screen, simulating the rythmic up and down motion of a girl on top of a really big pole. Her eyes are closed and her mouth is open in ecstacy before she bobs up and flashes a quick flirty smile]
"...and we just let them know right then and there that there's a God out there that cares for them and loves them, right where they're at!" Amen. I love you right where you're at baby. You play right into my Jesus Approved, Cavuto Inspired Barely-Legal Christian Conversion Sex Fantasy!

Neil: I'd like to thank you... both outside of LA, trying to do the Lord's Work, in the oddest of places ...

Shit! If I wanted a good Christian Masturbation Fantasy, FOX is the place to find it. Watch the video full screen if your wife is at the Baptist Bake Sale.

Now, seriously, boycott all of the sponsors. E-mail them and let them know that their time on FOX is a liability.